Monday, August 10, 2009

Gooooooood Times



I should have known this was the beginning of the end. So Friday, I planned a fancy dinner for Julie when she got home from work. Actually, her favorite meal. Grilled fish with a fancy Mediterranean sauce that involves quite a lot of prep. Then she was going to be late... I downgraded, and took out some meat to grill. Then she was going to be wicked late. I gave Claire a bath, put her to bed, and had this meal all alone... Chili Mac N Japs on a chipped plate.

Then I saw this bro on my clock... I says to myself I says, "Dood, that's a termite." Self looks it up on the internet (after seeing a dozen more in the house), and self confirms. The bug people are coming out in two days... the bug people already come out once a quarter and we pay them. Termites say, "they do a bang up job."

Did I mention we had a leak out at the street? Tons of water pouring out in front of our yard during drought season? Yeah... Plumber says (in an Australian accent that my wife deemed as "dreamy") that there's nothing up to code under our yard that can be fixed legally. Give him 3 large, and everything will be taken care of... goodbye rockstar plant... I could have bought 200 of you for this price, so who would complain that you're gone?
After these aholes are done, I get to put the dirt/rocks back in the ground and replace the grass outta my pocket, b/c 3000 bucks doesn't go as far as it used to. You'd think for that money, a dreamy voiced plumber would bring all his dreamy voiced naked girlfriends over to fix this problem... I asked, and turns out to not be the case.
The upside is we aren't lugging a baby, formula, clothes, makeup, selves up to the mother in law's (though I packed everything) for the evening b/c the plumbers pulled some strings, and dadgumit... they got our water back on! Thanks plumbers! Ready for plumbing class!!

6 comments:

Lisa said...

1. I don't like the label of this post.
2. Allen belly laughed at the picture of your dinner from the other night (and he wants the recipe).
3. Those termites were attracted to your fancy woodwork...far more superior than the typical wood they get to eat. They're shopping around and hit the jackpot.
4. Hang in there and drink up!

Jenn G. said...

thanks for confirming for me that the bugs i just killed in the bathroom are termites. gross. good thing i don't own this house. and did you tell the plumber that extortion is illegal?

Courtney said...

I laughed out loud all the way through this post. You are a genius.

deanna said...

looking up pics of termites right now...
what a way to end the week...sorry!!

Mom said...

I'm not suppose to laugh, dadgummit!! Oh yeah, none of this is a laughing matter. How are you able to make it one? If you make it up this weekend, you're welcome to fix that wonderful sounding fish dinner for me! XOXO

Better After said...

Hi BaldMan! I really love your yellow filing cabinet planter makeover. Do you mind if I feature it on my blog? (with credit to you, of course)

betterafter@live.com

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